can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Randomize
