if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
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