he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Randomize
