just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
