I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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