I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize