This is not my ceiling
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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