i don't plan on having that self control this summer
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Randomize
