im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
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