She's JV to your varsity
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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