Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
