WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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