Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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