But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
