My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
True strength comes from lack of pants
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
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