You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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