I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
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