If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
