everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Randomize
