is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
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