i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
The adults are the big ones right?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
