She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize