Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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