i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Randomize
