I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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