I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize