Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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