butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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