OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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