dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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