Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
