Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
