Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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