I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
