So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
you would pick up someone in the library
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize
