yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Randomize
