You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
