how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Barsexuality is the new black.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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