That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Randomize
