Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
we made out on top of his cat.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
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