Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Randomize
