Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
Little spoons don't ask big questions
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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