so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Randomize
