If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
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