take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
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