ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Randomize
