with your own penis?
Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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