I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
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