Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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