hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
