I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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