Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
